Sunday, March 29, 2009

alone no mo

The day I received Jesus Christ as my personal savior was just an ordinary day but definitely unforgettable.  It was the day that I would never be alone again. It might be easier to understand if you got a better sense of what I’m talking about when I say, “I would never be alone again.”  Throughout my childhood, I never had a sound sense of security.  I guess you can say I did not grow up in a normal household.  My parents divorced when I was three years old, and since then my childhood life has been a roller coaster of constantly moving, changing schools, and string of new stepmothers.  Fifth grade was when I felt the lowest.  My Father would always leave me home alone and my Mother, who had started a new life with her new husband, was practically unreachable.  It felt like not a single person in the world loved or cared about me.  I’ve never felt so alone.  Being alone became my greatest fear.
Adrian started bringing me to church around a year ago, but I still had doubts about God’s existence.  I even prayed to God for him to reveal Himself.  Nonetheless, I kept going to church.  A wise woman once told me that the reason God opened up the opportunity for me to move to the Bay Area was so I could seek Him.  God could have moved me anywhere in the world, but He opens up an opportunity so I could be placed in a community so rich in faith.  Now I see how true that is and how perfect God’s timing is.
I don’t know what inspired the conversation about my past between Adrian and me, that ordinary day, but it was through him that God’s love shined so brightly.  I realized that I have not been alone all along.  God has always been there and will always be.  It was this realization of God’s faithfulness and God’s love that I received Christ as my personal savior. 
Leaving behind my family and friends as I moved here, I began to once again feel alone.  I started coming to CBCSJ and I met people through fellowship.  I kept wondering why these people are so nice to me and showed so much love toward me even though we had just met. I now realize that the love of God inspires people to love.  I have never experienced so much love in my life.  God’s great love is shown through His people. 
I feel truly blessed that God has filled the void in my heart.  I hope my story can be inspiring to those who are feeling alone, so they can trust in God for guidance for God is faithful in His love.  Knowing God and accepting Jesus into my heart has given me strength and I am no longer afraid of being alone because I know I am not alone.  God will always be with me. 

1 comment:

Dar said...

Kel!! God is so good. You have no idea how happy I was to read this post. I don't even know what else to say, but I am so thankful and so happy for you. <3